Fiona Apple

Lugubrious ladies first: Fiona Apple, the Princess of Pessimism, is back with a new CD pretentiously entitled When the Pawn Hits the Conflicts He Thinks Like a King, What He Knows Throws the Blows When He Goes to the Fight, And He’ll Win the Whole Thing ’Fore He Enters the Ring, There’s No Body To Batter When Your Mind Is Your Might, So When You Go Solo You Hold Your Own Hand, And Remember That Depth Is the Greatest of Heights, And If You Know Where You Stand, Then You'll Know Where To Land, And If You Fall It Won’t Matter, Cuz You'll Know That You’re Right (Clean Slate/Epic). If brevity is truly the soul of wit, then clearly, Fiona is about as funny as a canker sore.

"The title came from being made fun of and then, of course, it becomes a thing I'm being made fun of for," Fiona said in a recent Time magazine interview. She is at once more ironic than Alanis, more jaded than Jewel, and more bitch than Meredith Brooks. Fiona is truly a woman to watch out for and stay the hell away from. One look at the lyric sheet for When the Pawn Hits... shows Miss Apple has more issues than National Geographic and more baggage than American Tourister. Songs like "To Your Love," "Limp" and "Love Ridden" point fingers and pout but do little to uplift or leave the listener as fretful as Fiona herself. "Cuz I know I'm a mess he don't wanna clean up," she sings in "Paper Bag." Well, at least she's not in denial.

Not to dismiss When the Pawn Hits... as a total tragedy, Fiona's voice does have a soulful quality, similar to Edie Brickell and Rickie Lee Jones, only deeper and more resonant. There's no denying Miss Apple's seductive charms, which stalk the listener like a panther on the prowl and perfectly compliment producer Jon Brion's tasteful arrangements which vary from the slow piano groove of "On the Bound," to the sultry jazz vibe of "To Your Love," and even get a little quirky with the rhythms and textures heard in "Paper Bag." If it weren't for all the lyrical brooding and bitterness, this might be a very likable, even romantic album. But, of course, Fiona is far too busy being cynical than to share a moment of human warmth or tenderness.

When the Pawn Hits... follows Fiona's phenomenally successful, award-winning 1996 debut CD Tidal which brought the previously unknown 19 year old worldwide attention and racked up sales in excess of three million copies. Now, at the ripe old age of 22, Miss Apple takes on the "sophomore jinx" with the same detached passion that originally brought her to the top of the pop charts. Her first video for When the Pawn Hits..., "Fast As You Can," will doubtlessly make an erotic and empowering production, with the help of her director boyfriend Paul Thomas Anderson (Boogie Nights). Fiona is obviously one bad apple who will not be happy until she's spoiled the whole damn bunch.

Rage Against the Machine

In 1996, Los Angeles-based Rage Against the Machine faced the challenge of topping a devastating debut album and buried all doubts as to their staying power with the double-platinum success of Evil Empire. Not bad for a militant, multiracial, rap, punk, metal group that professes, "Hope lies in the smoldering rubble of empires." This ain't the Backstreet Boys folks. Man, oh manifesto, Rage Against the Machine have returned with a new CD, The Battle of Los Angeles (Epic), and, if at all possible, they're madder than ever before.

Chiefly responsible parties for the RATM sound are Tom Morello whose machine-gun guitar fires off an incendiary selection of Sabbath-, Zeppelin- and MC5-styled riffs upon which singer Zack de la Rocha raps and rants relentlessly and with religious fervor about every extreme left-wing cause imaginable. From defending "political prisoner" Mumia Abu Jamal, to supporting by any means necessary the Zapatista rebels in Mexico, the Rage boys sound like they're ready to start blowing stuff up at any minute. I just wonder how they're going to get to their sold-out shows once Martial Law has been declared and all the roads have been closed and arenas turned into "detention centers."

If you can withstand RATM's whirlwind of rhetoric, The Battle of Los Angeles does have some electrifying energy built into its dozen sermons of bluster and babble. From the opening call to arms of "Testify," through the first single and video "Guerrilla Radio" and on through to the closing cacophony of "War Within a Breath," RATM mixes up bludgeoning beats, funky chunky riffs and rabid raps with a surprising flair for dynamics and production subtleties. The barrage doesn't stop till the CD's final digitized second, leaving you feeling like you've been through a bit of a war yourself. Ultimately though, as the Beatles sang in "Revolution," "If you're talking about destruction, brother don't you know that you can count me out." Sorry Zack, I'll take Lennon over Lenin any day.

Well, music fans, there ya have it and don't say I didn't warn you! Check it out, two new albums of today's hottest sounds as performed by the most anguished artists anywhere. Man, have I got a headache!

November 1999